“…. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.”
1 Corinthians 7:7
There’s no way Paul is saying singleness is a gift. How could it be a gift when all I felt was loneliness, sadness, and comparison. Gifts are meant to be good and desirable…right?
Three years ago, I couldn’t get to a place of believing my singleness was something God had gifted me—and gifts all of us. I struggled with this passage of Scripture because I desperately wanted a relationship and had trouble seeing the purpose of my singleness. Yet, even though I may have not been able to see the purpose, God did.
I asked myself this question repeatedly: “How am I ever going to be content?”
Contentment doesn’t come from any of our own doing, but by being fully surrendered and trusting that the Lord will bring you to that place. Philippians 4:12-13 says this: “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” It’s easy to take verse 13 out of context, but let’s look where Paul is when he’s writing this. Paul is in prison! Yet, he is saying he has found the secret of being content, and the secret is Jesus Christ. Our seasons will change, but He is constant and He remains faithful. A relationship isn’t the secret to contentment, Jesus is. Contentment doesn’t mean the desire for marriage goes away, because for me it hasn’t; yet it means you’re able to be fully present and enjoy the season you’re in. You can be content in your singleness, friend. But before you get there, He must become your everything.
And I believe if it weren’t for singleness, I wouldn’t have learned these things so intimately. I had to learn how to let Jesus be my everything. I had to learn how to delight in Him. I had to learn how to enjoy Him. And through that, I found contentment in the season of life I’m in. You have so much time when you’re single get to know the Lord. Allow Jesus to become your first love. The enemy wants to do everything he can to discourage and distract you in this season, but don’t let him! We must truly learn how to love God, how to enjoy Him, and how to delight in Him. Because that’s what we were created for. Are you delighting in the Lord? Is He your first love?
A season I just wanted to rush through and get out of, ended up being one of the sweetest seasons of my life. And this season is not over for me yet, so let my story encourage you, friend. There is purpose in every season of your life, even singleness. You don’t need a relationship to start serving Jesus. You don’t need a relationship to be content. You don’t need a relationship to start doing ministry. With Jesus, you have all that you need. Fall in love with Him and step into the things He has for you.
