Melissa Small supports her husband, Rusty, in his ministry as a pastor at Liberty Baptist Church while raising her 2 boys, James and Thomas. She also serves as the women’s ministry leader and on the worship team at her church. She has a passion for women growing deeper in their knowledge of God’s Word and fostering a supportive Christian community among women. A doctorate in Education and Christian Leadership aids in accomplishing these goals through teaching, mentoring, and Bible study.
My husband and I are on a mission trip to Honduras. As I think of the mission we have to share the love of Jesus, it brings my mind back to the mission at home. There is much to prepare and accommodate while we are gone. From our own children to church ministries, to extended family needs, we leave a lot behind to represent Christ to others. I recognize the community and village it takes to support this effort and yet, I know it is important to make it possible to experience serving Jesus with your spouse as a pastor’s wife. Having young children, I cannot accompany my husband on every travel occasion, but I work to make the time for opportunities to fellowship and minister side by side.
In youth ministry, it was more automatic as we were always ministering to the youth together. However, transitioning to lead pastor 15 years ago changed that dynamic. My husband now has obligations to counseling, weddings, funerals, men’s meetings, prayer meeting, and preaching that are not a direct couple’s ministry. In addition, our gifts and current children’s ages take us in different directions. I serve on the worship team, in women’s ministry, cherub choir, Awana, and the nursery, areas where my husband does not. Galatians 6:2 says, “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” We are to carry the ministry burdens and experience the joys of the fruit of our labor together.
As I prepared to leave on this mission trip, I thanked God ahead of time for the provision to serve together in another context. I also thanked God for the many who would step up so faithfully and willingly to fill the spaces that we typically serve to make this possible. I was expectant for what God will do in the lives of those we will meet on this journey and what He will do to deepen our walk with Him together. Praise God we are able to evangelize together and witness new believers accepting Christ as their Lord and Savior together!
If you are in a position where your husband is a minister and often, by default, serves in opposite areas than you do, or you work, or you have small children and cannot always participate, make time to find places to serve together and spend time together. Whether it’s a soup kitchen, a mission trip, a marriage retreat, or a day of service at the church together, find time to serve God together. God will bless these times to build up your marriage, remind your husband he is not alone in his service, and that you desire to serve alongside him. As wives we are called to respect our husbands and as sheep of our pastors we are called to encourage and uplift them. A minister’s wife has a unique opportunity to offer both on a deeper level. When offered, the time spent, and the camaraderie can make deep impacts. At the SBCV we speak of knowing you are not alone. Let your husband know he is not alone by investing in ministry alongside him, and put something in action on your calendar today!
